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Non-Binary Or NOT Love Them Anyway

Updated: Sep 24, 2022

As Pride Month draws to a close, I felt the need to put a spotlight on a very important topic. In 2022, understanding is very important. It's never been more important to understand people, our family and friends, our neighbours and work colleagues, but also people across the world and in the public eye. Sometimes we struggle to do that, which causes conflict and insult, but what we truly need is to increase our knowledge and open our eyes, so here we go.

From the beginning of time, all human beings have been born from a mother and a father in some way, who during the reproduction process, pass on the X and Y chromosomes. These chromosomes determine whether you are born a girl or a boy. Girls have XX chromosomes and boys have XY chromosomes. No matter what gender you are when you are born, without a shadow of a doubt, you are loved, you are a cherished "bundle of joy", everyone is excited about your arrival, they can’t wait to see what features you have inherited from your parents, and then they stand aside to witness how you evolve and mature into who you are destined to be.

The ultimate goal in life should be to love and respect everyone for exactly who they are and who they choose to be. There is a total of 7.96 billion people on Earth as I type this, and each individual is unique in personality, abilities, lifestyle choice, fingerprints and DNA. Everyone should be valued and respected regardless of their gender, ethnicity, religious beliefs, political stance, their sexuality, economic status and race. Everyone deserves love, respect, equality, a good standard of life, human rights and to be treated with dignity. And that's that! My American friends would say PERIODT!

Seek To Understand Non-Binary People

The term Non-binary is related to gender identities that are neither male or female, but sometimes both. So, although the above statement is true and all individuals have either XX or XY chromosomes, Non-binary individuals are outside of the gender binary. The decision to be considered non-binary is a very personal one. For some, it stems from the fact that they don’t identify with a specific gender, so are gender non-conforming or they feel as though the gender they identify with is actually the opposite to the chromosomes they have been biologically assigned. Some parents view their child as Non-binary and therefore request that the wider community (family, friends and child-care providers) treat them as such.

Each individual circumstance is unlike any other, so shouldn’t be treated as if one size of identity fits all. People also shouldn’t be ostracized from their family or the community as a result of their decision, but instead they should be allowed to be themselves. If someone identifies as Non-binary, as long as they are comfortable, they will make clear how they would like to be referred to and may open up about what caused them to identify as such. No one should be pressured into sharing, it is a very personal choice, and everyone has the right to be transparent about who they are in their own time and in their own way.

“When you bear in mind the pressures that everyone has on their shoulders, the ultimate goal for every individual should be to love and respect everyone for exactly who they are and who they have made a conscious decision to be. Life is hard enough without unnecessary discrimination and ill treatment.”

To help you along the way, you should REFRAIN from verbally and physically assaulting those who identify as Non-binary. You should WORK to make all people feel as though they are wanted and belong. NO ONE should be discriminated against for who they are and how they choose to live their life. After all, it is their life and it doesn't affect you or yours. DON'T label Non-binary people, therefore putting them all in a box and generalising based on untrue perspectives. USE the pronouns and names that people assign to themselves (sometimes they/them). It shows that you absolutely respect their wishes. In recent times, people have become more comfortable with stating what pronouns they would like you to use and display them on social media, in their email signature and will tell you face to face. Keep an eye and an ear out.

It's also important to UNDERSTAND that some Non-binary people reject the whole concept of gender and don’t like having labels imposed on them. Labels can feel restricting, however, they don’t all feel like they were born in the wrong body, so don’t assume that applies to all. REALISE that there is no test, or way to prove that you are Non-binary, so don’t suggest that someone is a fraud, keep an open mind and don't judge. Last but not least, CLEAR your mind of all stereotypes and myths, and instead realise that the resounding message is “I Am Non-binary But I'm Still ME!” then continue being a good friend, colleague, relative and overall human being.

Be Inspired!


"Non-Binary Or NOT Love Them Anyway"

Follow Kayisha Online on Instagram @KayishaOnline

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